India Uncut

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Sunday, September 24, 2006

Horoscopes for cows

Sometimes I feel like I'm in a Salvador Dali painting. And I'm melting. So surreal it can get.

Consider this IANS report that states, "Horoscope for milk producing cattle is under the serious consideration of Ranchi's Birsa Agriculture University (BAU)." The article continues:
"This will be a scientific horoscope which will be prepared on the basis of genes and chromosomes of the animals," said DK Singh, additional Director, BAU.

"The analysis of genes and chromosomes will help the Animal Husbandry Department to separate the high-milk-yielding animals from the low-yielding ones. Breeding will be done on the basis of such horoscopes," he said.
A horoscope "prepared on the basis of genes and chromosomes"? Whatever happened to the fricking stars? [Blogger looks up, blogger sees ceiling, fan needs cleaning, blogger looks down.] This is a paradigm shift, and I'm reeling (and no wonder that was foretold too).

We'll soon have flying cows at this rate. I'll be flying Kingfisher, and I'll look out the window, and there'll be a cow flying by with Bejan Daruwalla sitting on it. I'll gasp, and quickly indicate that I want a consultation. He'll smile, reach down, start milking the cow with both his hands, and say, "I've got my hands full right now."

(Link via email from confused.)

(Earlier posts on astrology and suchlike: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12.)

(Previous posts on cows: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31 , 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59.)
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