India Uncut

Remember this: the Delhi Municipal Corporation offering Rs 2000 per cow? Well, the Telegraph reports that as soon as the news was out, residents of Delhi gave up eve-teasing for cow-chasing, and the city was full of people chasing cows. But it wasn't quite that simple. The report says:

[T]he great capital cattle rush lasted only a single day and traffic to the pound was down to a trickle this morning.

The reason: the city fathers would not hand the catchers the cash they wanted but only a receipt.

“Show me the money,” cried Khalid, a B.Sc student at Aurobindo College, who had caught a cow at Malviya Nagar on Friday. He had torn his trousers and lost his slippers in the effort. He now wanted hard cash, not a scrap of paper with something scribbled on it.

“It was two hours of hard work. I chased it so hard. It even stamped on my foot and tore my slippers. I have bruises all over,” Khalid was inconsolable. “Yet all I got was a receipt. There was no money.”

[...]

Civic officials said an advertisement will be published soon explaining that cattle-catchers must prove they are residents of the area where they found the cow. They must produce a voter identity card or a similar document and a note from the local resident welfare association.

Aha. Bureaucracy. Don't turn in those cows, boys, they're far, far better creatures that the jerks who feed their families with your taxes, and take your cow away from you. Yes, that's your cow now, finders keepers. Take it home, give it a name, give it a bath if you so desire, and give it some grass.

No, Salil, not the kind you roll in a joint.

And no, please don't try this. (This link via email from Rahul.)

Previous posts on cows: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18 and 19.