India Uncut

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Friday, August 05, 2005

A profit of Rs 1950 (per cow)

The Bhopal Municipal Corporation is offering Rs 50 for every stray cow you hand over to it.

The Delhi Municipal Corporation is offering Rs 2000.

So if you're an employee in the cow department (I presume there must be one) of the Bhopal Municipal Corporation, the smart thing to do would be to hire a couple of cheap trucks, load the cows you get and take them over to Delhi. No?

(First link mentioned earlier here, and the second link was sent to me by five readers, separately. I tell you.)

In more cow mail, reader Veena emails me this gruesome tail, I mean, tale:
A friend of mine at work went skydiving yesterday somewhere in central Illinois which is famous for cornfields, more cornfields and cows. When my friend was up there hanging upside down enjoying the view, he apparently saw this jersey cow down below peacefully grazing in one of the cornfields. Our man, a cow hater, anticipating such a situation had stratregically left the zipper of one of his trouser pockets open. So as he was flying over this unfortunate cow, his rental car keys (would have weighed 5 lbs) fell out of his pocket and after executing a perfect aerodynamic free fall, hit the cow killing it instantly. Our victorious man then spent a good 14 hours in 95 degree heat gloating over the murder until the locksmith arrived to open his rental car. What do you think is the ideal punishment for such men?
"Men," you call such cow-killers? Snort! I do have an apt punishment, though. Make them watch "Yahaan".

Previous posts on cows: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16 and 17.
amit varma, 12:18 AM| write to me | permalink | homepage

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