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Saturday, July 29, 2006
My toe demands personal freedom, and strip poker
"I want to play strip poker," said my previously injured toe (not the blood-squirting one).
I looked down from my newspaper. "What the fug," I said. "What do you mean you want to play strip poker, you never wear any clothes anyway."
"Not at home, I don't," said previously injured toe. "But whenever you take me outside you put socks and shoes and suchlike on me. I can barely breathe."
"Indeed," piped in once-blood-squirting toe. "In fact, you treat us like women are treated in certain repressed societies. Be as undressed as you want at home, even walk around naked, but outside you gotta be all covered up, like hijab and suchlike."
"We want emacipation," said previously injured toe.
"Revolution," said once-blood-squirting toe.
"Personal freedom," said previously injured toe, which then added, "You know, for all your talk of libertarianism and so on, you're not particularly libertarian when it comes to your toes. What's up there, dude, Hayek never mentioned toes?"
"Ok, chill, chill," I said. "I'll wear slippers when I next go to the mall. That way you get to show yourself off to all the little female toes struggling to breathe in their high-heeled booties. Happy now?"
"Well sort of," said previously injured toe. "But you see, I don't mind leaving home wearing stuff."
"Then what do you want?" I barked.
"I want to play strip poker," it said.
I looked down from my newspaper. "What the fug," I said. "What do you mean you want to play strip poker, you never wear any clothes anyway."
"Not at home, I don't," said previously injured toe. "But whenever you take me outside you put socks and shoes and suchlike on me. I can barely breathe."
"Indeed," piped in once-blood-squirting toe. "In fact, you treat us like women are treated in certain repressed societies. Be as undressed as you want at home, even walk around naked, but outside you gotta be all covered up, like hijab and suchlike."
"We want emacipation," said previously injured toe.
"Revolution," said once-blood-squirting toe.
"Personal freedom," said previously injured toe, which then added, "You know, for all your talk of libertarianism and so on, you're not particularly libertarian when it comes to your toes. What's up there, dude, Hayek never mentioned toes?"
"Ok, chill, chill," I said. "I'll wear slippers when I next go to the mall. That way you get to show yourself off to all the little female toes struggling to breathe in their high-heeled booties. Happy now?"
"Well sort of," said previously injured toe. "But you see, I don't mind leaving home wearing stuff."
"Then what do you want?" I barked.
"I want to play strip poker," it said.
