India Uncut

This blog has moved to its own domain. Please visit for the all-new India Uncut and bookmark it. The new site has much more content and some new sections, and you can read about them here and here. You can subscribe to full RSS feeds of all the sections from here. This blogspot site will no longer be updated, except in case of emergencies, if the main site suffers a prolonged outage. Thanks - Amit.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

A new kind of battery

[You're in a household in India, in the drawing room, where Mr and Mrs M Desai sit in front of the TV. She is watching her favourite soap, Astitva, while he is browsing India Uncut on his laptop. Mrs Desai suddenly gets agitated, sitting upright and pointing the remote at the TV screen and pressing buttons furiously. She is so upset, in fact, that her palloo falls down, but Mr Desai is engrossed elsewhere.]

Mrs Desai: Listen, Tinku ke papa, the battery of my remote control seems to have run out.

Mr Desai: Where? I mean, yes dear, that happens.

Mrs Desai: Listen, Rinku ke bhi papa, please find me a battery from somewhere, I need to change channels.

Mr Desai: Oh dear, but why?

Mrs Desai: Oh, Chinku ke bhi papa, it's because Astitva is getting over on Zee, and I have to shift to Jassi Jaisi Koi Nahin on Sony.

Mr Desai: Hmm, pass the remote control here.

Mrs Desai: Yes, Pinku ke bhi papa. [She passes him the remote control, he takes out the battery, then he produces an unusual-looking battery from the pocket of his seductively transparent kurta. Mrs Desai blushes and lifts her palloo back up.]

Mrs Desai: What is that, Monkey ke bhi papa?

Mr Desai: It's a new kind of battery. But wait; before using it, I have to charge it first. [He gets up and starts removing the pheeta of his pyjama.]

Mrs Desai: [Alarmed] Oh, Funky ke papa, this is not the time. Tinku, Rinku, Chinku, Pinku, Monkey and Funky should be back from their tuition classes any moment now.

Mr Desai: Oh, don't get alarmed dear, and adjust your palloo please. I'm just going to charge the battery. Here, read this.

[He puts his laptop on her lap, where India Uncut is shown linking to this page. She clicks on the link, and enlightenment spreads upon her face, while something else spreads somewhere else. Just then, Tinku, Rinku, Chinku, Pinku, Monkey and Funky barge in.]

(Link via email from reader Vibhu, via Slashdot.)
amit varma, 11:33 PM| write to me | permalink | homepage

I recommend: