India Uncut

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Thursday, June 08, 2006

Another step in the war against drugs

Ring Ring.

Constable Salve: Hello, Constable Salve here, Page 3 department, Breach Candy Police Station.

Anonymous Tipster: [In nasal voice] Constable Salve, I am an anonymous tipster, and I am calling to warn you about the use of cocaine in the party you are going to tonight.

CS: Wait a minute, let me find my pen. [14 minutes pass.] Ah, I have found my pen. Tell now, where is this cocaine?

AT: It is in the cleavage.

CS: Cleavage? What cleavage? Whose cleavage?

AT: Your cleavage.

CS: [Looking down] My cleavage?

AT: Idiot, if I knew whose cleavage I would tell you, no? I don't know whose cleavage, but I have been told that the cleavage of a prominent socialite, who will come to the party tonight, is the hiding place for 2 kg of unadulterated cocaine.

CS: But if I don't know whose cleavage the cocaine is in, how will I find it?

AT: You'll just have to go sniffing, I'm afraid. Bye now. [Hangs up, dial tone comes.]

CS: But, but... [puts reciever down, thinks a bit, then shouts] Constable Pawar.

Constable Pawar: Yes, Constable Salve.

CS: Constable Pawar, get the police van ready, we have work to do. I think I'm just beginning to enjoy my job. [Sniffs.]

* * *

So what's this all about, you wonder. Here, read.

Update: Here's another take on it, by The Harlequin. (Link via email from reader Kaushal Desai.)
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