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Thursday, November 09, 2006
Downpaging
Jobs aren't the problem, writes Ian Frazier in the New Yorker. Books are.
I resent this disparagement of books, actually. I have thousands of books at home -- yes, I haven't read some of them, and yes, the partner's always complaining -- but they are of immense use to me. Let us consider some ways in which they bring value to my life:
I resent this disparagement of books, actually. I have thousands of books at home -- yes, I haven't read some of them, and yes, the partner's always complaining -- but they are of immense use to me. Let us consider some ways in which they bring value to my life:
- They can be used as furniture. Stack up two piles of books and you can keep an ashtray there. Stack up four piles and it can serve as a side-table. Eight stacks and an intimate dinner for two is a possibility. Think of them as Lego bricks that you can read.
- They can be used as murder weapons. A hardback of the unabridged plays of Shakespeare can cause severe damage to the corpus callosum.
- They can help you change a lightbulb. You need to stand on something, right?
- They can be used as decorative items. After all, so many people who buy books don't actually care about reading them, they just want to be seen as well-read. Display is everything. Just don't try and match the blue book with the green one.
- They can be used in social occasions to punctuate awkward silences. At a social gathering and don't know what to do? Pick up a book and pretend to be skimming through it. After all, how many SMSs can you pretend to send?
