India Uncut

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Sunday, August 28, 2005

Morya Re

[You're in heaven. God is sitting at the table next to you, sipping a ristretto, looking distressed. Satan walks in.]

Satan: Hey, dude God, how's life? You called, and here I am.

God: [Sighing] Sit down, Satan, sit down.

Satan: [sitting] Hey, dude God, what's up? You aren't looking too, if I may say it, good today. If you're feeling horny, I could help set something up.

God: No, no, it's not carnal. It's just that, well, I'm so bored out here in heaven. And everytime my intercom buzzes, it's some boring human worshipping me in some boring way. I'm sick of this.

Satan: Hmmm. I could tell you to go to hell. Or rather, come to my party tonight. But dude God, you've looked pretty pleased this time of the year for the last few years. You rather used to enjoy the bhajans they played at Ganesh mandals in that Indian city, Bombay or Mumbai or whatever. What happened now?

God: You bet I used to enjoy it. In the last few years, they've been playing bhajans to the tune of popular Hindi songs. But, as you can read in this report, they're putting an end to it. Back to the boring devotional tunes.

Satan: Well, I'll be damned. Actually, heh, I already am. Hmmm. [Clicks on the report.] Hey, this is an interesting bit:
A CD called Ganpati Top 15, marketed by Krunal Music has tunes from Amitabh Bachchan-starrer Bunty aur Babli, other Hindi movies and some raunchy Telugu movie numbers. These CDs are flying off the shelves. Kajra re, for instance, has lyrics that go, “Morya re, morya re, Ganpati Bappa morya re.”
God: Sigh. Yes, that CD rocked. Especially Morya Re, such a fun song, raunchy in a holy kind of way. But those days are over. Cry. Sob. Weep.

Satan: There, there, cheer up, dude God. Come over to hell in the evening, and I'll set up some dance-bar action for you. Ok?

God: Sniffle. I'll be there.
amit varma, 12:57 AM| write to me | permalink | homepage

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